Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Gov. Perry's Empty Rally

One of the first lessons in politics I learned is never schedule an event for a room larger than your audience. It can be smaller, even way smaller, it can be so much smaller the fire marshal is having a hissy fit over code violations. It's better to have 30 people squeezed into a room that only fits 20 than to have 100 people rattling around in a hall that seats 1,000.
Not a great photo op.
For months now Texas Governor Rick Perry has been planning this huge seven hour day of prayer and fasting (and Presidential campaign rally) for Reliant Field in Houston. Reliant seats 71,000. So far Perry has signed up only 8,000.

It's hard enough to get people into the park for Astros games when the concession stands are open. Promise to starve them and most people will find some other way to spend a summer's day.

There are a few ways Perry can still save his day.
  1. Gather his paltry crowd into a couple of sections and hire several hundred security guards to keep press photographers from getting the bigger picture. 
  2. Trash that fasting nonsense and offer free meals and free beer.
  3. Wet t-shirt contests.
  4. Have local churches declare failing to attend a mortal sin.
  5. Call out the Texas National Guard and force them to attend.
  6. Buy 50,000 cardboard cutouts of Justin Bieber.

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